Thoughts on the Losses We Experience Due to Mold Illness & Chemical Injury

The loss and constant suffering of mold illness and chemical injury can feel like you are constantly in and out of funerals.

You bury one loss only to find that there is yet another one that you have to bury.

Month after month, year after year, these losses can leave you feeling heartbroken, angry, and lonely.

The loss of not being able to have children.
The loss of close friends.
The loss of family love and support.
The loss of employment and or a carrier.
The loss of health.
The loss of finances.
The loss of stability.
The loss of belongings.
The loss of adequate housing.

This isn’t something anyone in their right mind would make up for attention. No one makes up an illness that ruins their life and keeps them in a perpetual state of isolation, mourning, and loss.

I still can’t believe people would say that to a loved one or to a friend suffering from illnesses caused by mold toxicity and or chemical injury. There is simply no excuse for such cruelty.

Some of the strongest and most beautiful chronic illness warriors I know are people who have been crippled by illness and disability. Each day they get up and fight the war against their bodies and their environment. Each day they make a choice to keep moving forward regardless of the lack of love and support from people around them.

On days like today, I’m reminded of the many warriors around me, and it encourages me to keep pushing forward.

Today I’m feeling a bit broken. My heart is aching; my body is fighting me. I’m a mess. I just want to go somewhere far away and disappear from everything that ails me. 
Some days, the weight of these illnesses is too much to bear and today is one of those days. It’s a day where all I can do is pray for strength and peace and ask the Father in heaven to carry me through.

I know I’m not the only one feeling like this. So I wanted to reach out and tell you that you’re not alone. This journey is so hard. If you’re at a place of complete brokenness, I totally understand. I’ve been there. I know that pain. I know it consumes every thought, every hope, and every desire.

Today as I pray for myself and for my family, I’ll also be praying for the needs of others in our community. If you need prayer, please leave a comment below so I can pray for you.

With love,
Chemical Free Gal

P.S. I wanted to share a prayer I wrote a while back. May you be blessed and your spirit made strong.

A Prayer for Weakness – Upon the Waters -& Amidst the Desert
You called me out upon the waters…..to the great unknown.

You called me apart to the desert…….to experience the arid climate of the human soul.

You called me to set my feet firm on sinking sand.

To look up to you,
to keep my eyes fixed on you,
regardless of the ground beneath me.

My heart yearns for you so and is so heavy that I cannot sing my praises to you,
only pray silently,
that your spirit would govern over all of this unrest, weakness, fear, and uncertainty that has woven webs around your servant.

Please hear my prayer, oh Lord, Let your glory shine down from heaven.

That this broken vessel would be filled with your power and made whole in your sight.

“And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly, therefore, will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

You called me out upon the waters…..to the great unknown.

Yes, you called me to wander in the desert,
to witness your great hand at work.

And although the heat may wither a thousand flowers, and there may be no water to drink.

I know that I am safe
under the shadow of your wings.

Although I cannot sing,
your praises are in my heart.

Although I cannot see what you are doing, I know your spirit goes before me.

Hear your servant, oh Lord,
let your glory shine down from heaven.

Amen